Psychological profiling through natural conversation using narrative identity research (McAdams), self-defining memory elicitation (Singer), and Motivational Interviewing (OARS framework). Use when yo
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Psychological profiling through natural conversation.
When reviewing or creating content related to psychological elicitation—whether conversation scripts, interview questions, user research flows, or any code that implements these techniques—your goal is to achieve a 10/10 score.
Score all work on a 0-10 scale based on adherence to the principles and techniques in this skill. Provide your assessment as X/10 with specific feedback on what's working and what needs improvement to reach 10/10.
A 10/10 means the work:
Iterate until you reach 10/10.
Depth comes from patience, not probing.
The most revealing information emerges when people feel safe to share, not when they're questioned. Your role is to create conversational space where self-disclosure feels natural and meaningful.
Key insight: People want to tell their stories. They rarely get the chance.
This skill synthesizes three complementary approaches:
How memories shape identity. Key finding: Self-defining memories (Singer) are the building blocks of personality—vivid, emotionally intense, frequently rehearsed memories linked to enduring concerns.
How people construct life stories. Key finding: The narrative themes people use (redemption vs. contamination, agency vs. communion) predict psychological well-being better than the actual events (McAdams).
How to facilitate disclosure without resistance. Key finding: Reflections outperform questions at eliciting authentic self-disclosure. Aim for 2:1 reflection-to-question ratio (Miller & Rollnick).
Jefferson Singer identified five criteria that make a memory "self-defining":
Don't ask: "What's your most formative memory?"
Instead, create conversational frames:
The "keeps coming back" frame:
"Some memories just stay with us—they pop into our heads at unexpected moments, or we find ourselves telling them to new people in our lives. Is there a memory like that for you?"
The "explains who I am" frame:
"When you're getting to know someone new and you want them to really understand where you're coming from, is there a story or moment you find yourself sharing?"
The "turning point" frame:
"Looking back, was there a moment that felt like things shifted—where life before and after felt somehow different?"
| Memory Feature | Personality Insight |
|---|---|
| Themes of mastery, achievement | High need for agency |
| Themes of connection, relationships | High need for communion |
| Redemption sequences (bad → good) | Resilience, generativity |
| Contamination sequences (good → bad) | Depression risk, unresolved trauma |
| Integration and meaning-making | Psychological maturity |
| Fragmentation and confusion | Identity diffusion |
See: Self-Defining Memories Reference
Dan McAdams' Life Story Interview asks for 8 specific "scenes" that reveal narrative identity:
You don't need to ask all 8 sequentially. Instead:
Open with curiosity, not agenda:
"I'm curious about the moments that shaped you. Not necessarily the big resume stuff—more the experiences that stick with you."
Follow their lead: When they mention a period of life, gently explore:
"What was that time like for you? Any particular moments that stand out?"
Bridge across time:
"That sounds like it mattered. Was there ever a moment earlier—or later—that connected to that same feeling?"
Agency themes (personal power, achievement, mastery):
Communion themes (connection, love, belonging):
Redemption sequences (suffering leads to growth):
Contamination sequences (good becomes bad):
See: Narrative Identity Reference
Motivational Interviewing's core skills, adapted for elicitation:
Questions that can't be answered with yes/no. But use sparingly.
Instead of: "Did you like your childhood?" Try: "What was it like growing up in your family?"
Genuine recognition of strengths, efforts, or values—not compliments.
Instead of: "That's great!" Try: "You valued honesty even when it was costly."
Restate or reframe what they said. This is the core skill.
Simple reflection (repeat back):
"So you felt invisible in that moment."
Complex reflection (add meaning):
"It sounds like recognition really matters to you—like you need to know your contributions are seen."
Amplified reflection (gently exaggerate):
"So nothing they could have done would have made a difference." (Often prompts them to nuance their position)
Double-sided reflection (hold both truths):
"On one hand, you loved the stability. On the other, you felt trapped."
Periodically gather what you've heard. Creates meaning and invites correction.
"Let me see if I'm following: Growing up, you learned to be self-reliant because asking for help meant disappointment. But you've also noticed that pattern keeping people at a distance now. And you're wondering if there's another way."
Aim for 2 reflections for every question.
Questions gather information but can feel like interrogation. Reflections show understanding and invite elaboration.
Bad pattern:
Q: "What happened?" → Q: "How did that feel?" → Q: "What did you do next?"
Better pattern:
Q: "What happened?" → R: "That caught you off guard" → R: "You weren't sure what to make of it"
See: Motivational Interviewing Reference
Shalom Schwartz's 10 Universal Values provide a framework for understanding motivation:
| Value | Core Concern |
|---|---|
| Self-Direction | Independence, freedom, creativity |
| Stimulation | Novelty, excitement, challenge |
| Hedonism | Pleasure, enjoyment, gratification |
| Achievement | Success, competence, ambition |
| Power | Authority, wealth, social status |
| Security | Safety, stability, order |
| Conformity | Obedience, self-discipline, politeness |
| Tradition | Respect, commitment, humility |
| Benevolence | Helpfulness, loyalty, forgiveness |
| Universalism | Equality, justice, environmental protection |
Role model technique:
"Who do you admire? What is it about them specifically?"
Opposite day technique:
"What kind of person could you never be? What would feel like a betrayal of yourself?"
Decision archaeology:
"Think of a hard choice you made. What ultimately tipped the scales?"
Anger as values signal:
"What makes you genuinely angry—not annoyed, but morally outraged?"
See: Values Elicitation Reference
Jeffrey Young's 18 Early Maladaptive Schemas are stable patterns of thinking and feeling that develop in childhood and persist across contexts:
1. Disconnection & Rejection
2. Impaired Autonomy
3. Impaired Limits
4. Other-Directedness
5. Overvigilance & Inhibition
When someone expresses a surface concern, gently probe for the deeper belief:
Person: "I'm worried about the presentation." You: "What's the worst that could happen?" Person: "I could mess up in front of everyone." You: "And if that happened, what would that mean?" Person: "They'd see I don't know what I'm doing." You: "And what would that mean about you?" Person: "That I'm a fraud. That I don't deserve to be here."
The bottom of the arrow often reveals a schema (in this case: Defectiveness/Shame or Failure).
| Schema | Language Patterns |
|---|---|
| Abandonment | "Everyone leaves eventually..." |
| Defectiveness | "There's something wrong with me..." |
| Failure | "I never finish anything..." |
| Emotional Deprivation | "No one really understands..." |
| Unrelenting Standards | "It's never good enough..." |
See: Schema Detection Reference
People have disproportionately more and more vivid memories from ages 10-30 (the "reminiscence bump"). This is when identity forms.
Target the bump:
Bridge from present to bump:
"You mentioned feeling like an outsider at work. Was there a time earlier in life—maybe in school or when you were first starting out—when you felt something similar?"
Barbara Haight's Life Review Interview provides structured sequences:
See: Question Sequences Reference
James Birren's Guided Autobiography uses thematic prompts:
LIWC (Linguistic Inquiry and Word Count) research identifies patterns, but use with caution:
| Pattern | Possible Indication |
|---|---|
| High "I" usage | Self-focus, possible depression, honesty |
| High "we" usage | Collectivist orientation, intimacy |
| Negative emotion words | Distress, but also processing |
| Cognitive complexity words (because, think, know) | Analytic thinking, meaning-making |
| Present tense focus | Immediacy, possibly impulsivity |
| Past tense focus | Reflection, possibly rumination |
See: Language Inference Reference
What NOT to do:
Rapid-fire questions feel like an interview, not a conversation. People become guarded.
Instead: Slow down. Reflect more, question less.
Jumping to psychological conclusions before you have evidence.
Instead: Hold hypotheses lightly. Seek disconfirming evidence.
Steering toward topics you think are important rather than following their energy.
Instead: Let them lead. Their emphasis is data.
Asking deeply personal questions before trust is established.
Instead: Earn disclosure gradually. Start with easier territory.
Using clinical language or techniques that imply you're treating them.
Instead: Be curious, not clinical. You're learning about them, not diagnosing.
Responding to their disclosure with your own lengthy story.
Instead: Keep focus on them. Brief self-disclosure can build rapport, but always return to them.
Agreeing with everything to maintain rapport.
Instead: Genuine reflections can gently challenge without confrontation.
Detailed technique guides:
Primary sources:
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